saw an ad on craigslist yesterday for a job near my house and today i headed down to 30th and killingsworth. given the horror stories that i have let scare me about portland unemployment, i was expecting a line around the corner like ryan gosling was inside bossing up customers. nope-no applicants, not even customers. they are super sweet up in this piece. when i tell them i am applying, casual mccutie girl tells me that they have had a lot of applicants, and to weed out the unworthy (my words) they are asking each person a few questions.
"how do you feel about the geo tracker?"
"is that like... a car gps?"
"no it's this little piece of shit suv kinda thing. we are asking everyone about their thoughts on it."
"well, i have literally never driven a car before, i'm sorry i don't really have a point of reference."
"don't be sorry, that's pretty badass! can you answer a few questions on the back of your resume? about the geo tracker, what kind of music you like, and why you want to help us out in the dish pit. thaaaanks!" chicky disappears.
i have a seat, reiterate my lack of knowlege about cars and hatred of suvs for the first question, the second one was way more fun, uh-duh. i told them about how me and lykke li have been having a year-long love affair, that me and tickley feather are soul mates, and that i stalk both wavves and dead man's bones (only, ya know, like totes in a professional format.) i told them stones over beatles cuz i'm old-fashioned like that, and lennon not mc cartney.
boop, best question evar. gimmee yer jobz.
me n yazi have been digi-stalking lykke li all day. come join us!
pure. fucking. SAVAGERY. nothing else to say about it.
the icing on the cake of a happy day is this: i realized i have a frozen pizza. MINE! ALL MINE! sidenote: guess what i'm eating right now, and probs for dinner?
(UPDATE: that was jess' pizza... :( )
also, jekka's mom is here hooray!
sally "lurker" mulligan
4 years ago